IC Inbox

[summertimeblues]

Shit there's video calling now?





((content warning for aspic, please avert your eyes all ye who enter here))

Comments

[flashystyle]

What could I possibly learn from this experience? You're making a fool of me, I know it. I was just asking a simple question for the greater good—

[Dorian pushes the cucumber.

Dorian yelps, and drops his phone.]

What the fuck, Richie!

[summertimeblues]

[His laughter is poorly muffled.]

Listen, listen...

If you break my records, that cucumber will be your dick.

[flashystyle]

[The expression of realization and pure horror that Dorian wears as he looks between his phone screen and the garbage disposal full of a poor dick shaped vegetable can go under the definition of fear in a dictionary.]

I won't break your records.

[summertimeblues]

[This poor medieval bastard.]

Wonderful! Permission granted!

[flashystyle]

Wonderful. I... have to... go... die, now.

[summertimeblues]

Make sure you put on a good diaper! The bowels evacuate once you cork it.

[flashystyle]

Stop! Stop talking! I'm picking them up later, goodbye!

[Dorian, on the verge of being hysterical, hangs up.]

[summertimeblues]

[the last thing he hears is Richie dying of laughter

Later tater]